"Is there a protest tomorrow? I saw ones today but not Sunday." My clever friend replies, "I think there's a protest every day for the rest of time." Welcome to 2017!
The stakes are high, and my energy is waning as gray winter days linger and the Drumpf presidency barrels ever recklessly forward. Like so many others in recent weeks, I'm making calls, showing up at protests, signing petitions, reaching out to others to take action, trying to keep myself up-to-date and informed all the while juggling everything in life that existed prior to January 20th.
I haven't quite figured it out yet, but I have realized something's gotta give. Now is not the time to give up eating healthy meals and cooking at home - I need my strength! However, there's little energy left to devote to the kitchen lately and certainly less time.
In case it's helpful to anyone else out there, here are a few quick, easy meals I've thrown together for myself over the last few weeks which had my coworkers asking where I bought my lunch.
Mexican (No Wall) Lasagna
In a round take out container, layer corn tortillas with beans, corn (my favorite is the roasted frozen corn from TJs), shredded cheese, and sour cream. Sprinkle filling with lime juice (this totally takes it up a notch!). Feel free to add peppers, spinach (I try to always have some frozen spinach on hand), sauteed onions, leftover rice, etc.
Make as many layers as you like. I used just two tortillas - one on the bottom, one over the filling ingredients. Top with salsa or hot sauce. Fast, portable, perfect for lunch. When ready to eat, microwave and top with avocado. The avocado is optional, but it really adds some great color and texture to this dish.
Faux (Facts) Pho
This one has been my "I really don't have time to make lunch" go-to for several years. In your Tupperware of choice, combine frozen corn, peas, carrots, etc and a bit of either veggie broth concentrate or your preferred teriyaki/gyoza dipping sauce/hoisin, etc and red pepper flakes. For added protein, I also throw in either veggie frozen meatballs or Trader Joe's veggie chorizo (if using chorizo, you can skip the other sauce). Bring to work along with either a package of Vietnamese rice noodles or Ramen (no sodium packet needed).
When ready to eat, microwave noodles with enough water to cover for a few minutes. I shorten cooking time by using hot water from our office industrial coffee maker or water cooler (both have hot water options). After a few minutes, add frozen vegetables in sauce and cook for another minute. Enjoy!
Resistance Ravioli
I really enjoy store-bought fresh or frozen "fancy" ravioli, but I find it's not enough by itself to feel like a truly satisfying meal. So I jazz it up.
Tonight, I made a mushroom & cheese ravioli. While it boiled, I microwaved some frozen peas for a minute, topped with a bit of ricotta, and microwaved another 30 seconds. Four or five raviolis on top of the peas and ricotta sprinkled with a bit of olive oil (I had some truffle oil - yum!) and some bleu/blue cheese turn this ordinary pasta dish into the oh-so-soul-soothing comfort food we could all use right about now.
Additional Pro Tips
Save precious time and energy peeling and chopping by using canned and frozen veggies. They're fast, affordable, and you still get your vitamins. I also appreciate that they're shelf stable and won't go bad on you in a matter of days like fresh spinach for example.
I've also been mostly buying root vegetables and squashes - great hearty food for winter, and they keep in the fridge for quite a long time if I'm too busy to get to them for a week while out at meetings or you know say protests every weekend.
Bon appetit! Fired up - ready to go!
Sunday, February 5, 2017
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Superhero Power #55 - Getting Good Customer Service
Case Study: Furniture Company
Step 1: Submit form online per company's instructions to report an issue - receive auto-response promising someone will be in touch in one business day
--No response after several days--
Step 2: Resubmit form, take screenshot of auto-response, and email to yourself to have time stamp
--No response for over 24 hours--
Step 3: Forward email with time stamp and screenshot attachment to director of customer service and one of the owners (I've dealt with this company previously) alerting them that it seems perhaps there is an issue with their website forms but that now you still have your previous issue AND a problem with their customer service.
Step 4: Receive call from customer service rep in under an hour!
...and thus begins the process to actually address the furniture issue, but hey, now you have an attentive rep to see what they can do for you.
Step 1: Submit form online per company's instructions to report an issue - receive auto-response promising someone will be in touch in one business day
--No response after several days--
Step 2: Resubmit form, take screenshot of auto-response, and email to yourself to have time stamp
--No response for over 24 hours--
Step 3: Forward email with time stamp and screenshot attachment to director of customer service and one of the owners (I've dealt with this company previously) alerting them that it seems perhaps there is an issue with their website forms but that now you still have your previous issue AND a problem with their customer service.
Step 4: Receive call from customer service rep in under an hour!
...and thus begins the process to actually address the furniture issue, but hey, now you have an attentive rep to see what they can do for you.
Thursday, March 26, 2015
What I Wish I Knew at 22 - It's OK to Inconvenience Others
It started with this:
"Fellow CA trailblazers... I hope all is well! [...] Our goal is for the entire class to be added in order to begin communication regarding a 15-year reunion. [...] I challenge you all to leave any old squabbles in the past and join me in celebrating this occasion as it is bigger than us as individuals!"
A seemingly innocuous post for my upcoming high school reunion. Straightforward enough, but the last line hit me in the gut. It just so happens that the post was written by someone who several years after high school sexually assaulted me in another classmate's apartment. This led to the loss of several friendships... and so earlier this week, I sat blinking at my computer wondering, "By squabbles, does he mean what happened??" That would certainly be an understatement. OR has he totally forgotten and had other "squabbles" over the years with people from our class?
In many ways, the answer doesn't matter - although I was plenty angry that night and beyond tempted to post a comment revealing what had happened and asking whether that's what he had in mind. We all know it's not worth it.
However, I AM worth it. And so are the thousands of people who are assaulted by acquaintances every year. I decided to write this post for 22 year old me and especially for all the young people I'm Facebook friends with who might find themselves in similar situations.
The events were as typical as they come. A bunch of friends in our early 20s - several of us who had gone to high school together - hanging out at Matt's* apartment. Some of the guys decided to have a "power hour" and began chugging beer after beer and getting very drunk. I don't remember what time it was when they stopped drinking, but it had gotten late.
John* had had the most to drink and announced that he was going to drive home. We all knew this was a terrible idea and did our best to convince him to stay the night. I was sober and could have gone home, but since we couldn't get his car keys away from him, I agreed to stay to make sure he stayed. I felt very strongly about keeping a drunk driver off the roads. We were good friends, and I felt comfortable sleeping on a foldout couch with John. I wanted to make sure he stayed safe. What I sometimes still have a hard time forgiving myself for is the repeated choices I made that night to protect others but not myself. Although, of course, the events never should have happened.
Matt and his girlfriend soon went to sleep. I was falling asleep on the couch when I started feeling John's hand on my breast. I told him to stop. He said it wasn't him, it was his "crazy hands." I insisted he stop, but he wouldn't. I rolled over and put my arms squarely on either side of my chest. He began to fondle my butt. Again and again, I told him to stop. I said I would leave, and he said then he would drive home. This continued for hours. I didn't wake up Matt and his girlfriend, because I didn't want to disturb them. WHY?? I have replayed this scenario in my mind so many times.
Here's the thing - by my early 20s, I had taken oodles of women's studies classes and even a truly excellent self-defense class where I learned to hit with my full strength. Yet when confronted with a very drunk friend who I knew I could hurt if I kicked or hit him, I did nothing but roll over and threaten to but not actually leave. I literally rolled over and took it.
I truly believe I thought that he would come to his senses and stop at any moment. That he would realize how inappropriate and wrong his actions were. That I could somehow reason with him. What I didn't know until later was just how drunk he was. So much so that the next day he didn't remember anything - whereas I spent the day crying and feeling completely violated. Even so, it wasn't the physical assault that has stayed with me all these years - it's the fallout after.
I tried to talk to John, but he remembered nothing and refused to hear my side. Matt later said he had already talked to John and didn't "want to be in the middle." He also refused to hear my side. But I was the sober one! So I lost several close friends of no fault of my own who I had exerted so much energy protecting at the price of my own safety and well being. Some months later, I learned from another friend John actually had a suspended license the night of the party and prior DUIs and as well as other stories. There was no protecting John.
So here's my lesson - Inconvenience others!!! Wake up the other friends. Leave if you need to. We cannot protect others from themselves, but we should always, always do our best to protect ourselves. If it means hurting someone who is hurting you, there are instances where this is appropriate and necessary. I wish I could go back and share this lesson with 10 year old me and 15 year old me and 20 year old me. I'm built to nurture, and I love that part of myself. I just have to be careful how and when to use it. For now, I'll settle with passing on my experience to anyone who will listen.
*Names have been changed to protect me from getting sued. It seems like an injustice to generic names in the interest of anonymity though. I know some very lovely Johns and Matts. Sorry to you.
"Fellow CA trailblazers... I hope all is well! [...] Our goal is for the entire class to be added in order to begin communication regarding a 15-year reunion. [...] I challenge you all to leave any old squabbles in the past and join me in celebrating this occasion as it is bigger than us as individuals!"
A seemingly innocuous post for my upcoming high school reunion. Straightforward enough, but the last line hit me in the gut. It just so happens that the post was written by someone who several years after high school sexually assaulted me in another classmate's apartment. This led to the loss of several friendships... and so earlier this week, I sat blinking at my computer wondering, "By squabbles, does he mean what happened??" That would certainly be an understatement. OR has he totally forgotten and had other "squabbles" over the years with people from our class?
In many ways, the answer doesn't matter - although I was plenty angry that night and beyond tempted to post a comment revealing what had happened and asking whether that's what he had in mind. We all know it's not worth it.
However, I AM worth it. And so are the thousands of people who are assaulted by acquaintances every year. I decided to write this post for 22 year old me and especially for all the young people I'm Facebook friends with who might find themselves in similar situations.
The events were as typical as they come. A bunch of friends in our early 20s - several of us who had gone to high school together - hanging out at Matt's* apartment. Some of the guys decided to have a "power hour" and began chugging beer after beer and getting very drunk. I don't remember what time it was when they stopped drinking, but it had gotten late.
John* had had the most to drink and announced that he was going to drive home. We all knew this was a terrible idea and did our best to convince him to stay the night. I was sober and could have gone home, but since we couldn't get his car keys away from him, I agreed to stay to make sure he stayed. I felt very strongly about keeping a drunk driver off the roads. We were good friends, and I felt comfortable sleeping on a foldout couch with John. I wanted to make sure he stayed safe. What I sometimes still have a hard time forgiving myself for is the repeated choices I made that night to protect others but not myself. Although, of course, the events never should have happened.
Matt and his girlfriend soon went to sleep. I was falling asleep on the couch when I started feeling John's hand on my breast. I told him to stop. He said it wasn't him, it was his "crazy hands." I insisted he stop, but he wouldn't. I rolled over and put my arms squarely on either side of my chest. He began to fondle my butt. Again and again, I told him to stop. I said I would leave, and he said then he would drive home. This continued for hours. I didn't wake up Matt and his girlfriend, because I didn't want to disturb them. WHY?? I have replayed this scenario in my mind so many times.
Here's the thing - by my early 20s, I had taken oodles of women's studies classes and even a truly excellent self-defense class where I learned to hit with my full strength. Yet when confronted with a very drunk friend who I knew I could hurt if I kicked or hit him, I did nothing but roll over and threaten to but not actually leave. I literally rolled over and took it.
I truly believe I thought that he would come to his senses and stop at any moment. That he would realize how inappropriate and wrong his actions were. That I could somehow reason with him. What I didn't know until later was just how drunk he was. So much so that the next day he didn't remember anything - whereas I spent the day crying and feeling completely violated. Even so, it wasn't the physical assault that has stayed with me all these years - it's the fallout after.
I tried to talk to John, but he remembered nothing and refused to hear my side. Matt later said he had already talked to John and didn't "want to be in the middle." He also refused to hear my side. But I was the sober one! So I lost several close friends of no fault of my own who I had exerted so much energy protecting at the price of my own safety and well being. Some months later, I learned from another friend John actually had a suspended license the night of the party and prior DUIs and as well as other stories. There was no protecting John.
So here's my lesson - Inconvenience others!!! Wake up the other friends. Leave if you need to. We cannot protect others from themselves, but we should always, always do our best to protect ourselves. If it means hurting someone who is hurting you, there are instances where this is appropriate and necessary. I wish I could go back and share this lesson with 10 year old me and 15 year old me and 20 year old me. I'm built to nurture, and I love that part of myself. I just have to be careful how and when to use it. For now, I'll settle with passing on my experience to anyone who will listen.
*Names have been changed to protect me from getting sued. It seems like an injustice to generic names in the interest of anonymity though. I know some very lovely Johns and Matts. Sorry to you.
Monday, September 29, 2014
Superpower #52 - Willpower over tasty food smelling enticingly in one's kitchen
Holy cannoli! Another four months have flown by! In fairness, I have written several blog posts for other blogs in that time, but clearly it's high time for one here. New year, new post! ...and a personal resolution to post more often.
When cooking, it's often easier for me to prepare large batches rather than one or two servings at a time. Sometimes I worry that I will get sick of something I've made, and sometimes, like tonight, I make something SO good I have to blog about it just to keep from eating the entire pan! I bring you - the Monday Night Frittata. As anyone who knows me well can tell you, any kitchen creation I concoct is typically a hybrid of several recipes or inspirations. This is also a point of much chagrin for those who are foolish enough to ask me for a recipe of something I've made for them. However, in this instance, I think I can actually provide one. Feel free to tinker away with it yourselves!
But first, I would like to congratulate myself on my own Monday superpowers. While some of my friends are out training for marathons, triathlons, planning large scale events such as weddings, etc., I have accomplished what I think is perhaps an equally amazing feat today. I woke up before sunrise (around 5:15 am) and went to yoga, witnessing a spectacular magenta sunrise on U Street on the way there. I was able to hold crow for several seconds for the first time! But wait there's more!
After an incredibly productive day at work with many decisions made which felt more like a Thursday or Friday - I went grocery shopping, had dinner, did laundry, AND cooked for the week. You see where the cooking is coming into play? I had some eggs and bell peppers which needed to be consumed soon, and so the idea of a frittata had come to mind earlier in the day. I have also recently resumed my love affair with my cast iron skillet, so really, I was daydreaming about this frittata-making on this cloudy Monday ALL day.
The inspiration for my Monday frittata came in part from The Pioneer Woman's (TPW) "Sunday Frittata" which can be found here: http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2013/12/sunday-frittata/ The great thing about frittatas much like paella is that you can throw virtually whatever you have around into it.
Mine included:
2 medium onions
2 bell peppers (one yellow, one orange if you're REALLY curious)
1/4 box of whole wheat thin spaghetti
5 eggs
1/2 to 3/4 cup shredded mozzarella
Smoked paprika
Salt & pepper
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
Bit o' butter
This could not be simpler! I cut the onions in half then sliced them and got them going in the cast iron skillet on the stove top in a little bit of vegetable oil and later adding a bit o' butter. I let them cook long enough where they actually started to caramelize, and I have found this works better when they are sliced not chopped. Then I began slicing the bell peppers while the water for the pasta was also going. At some point (yes, impeccable precision here), the spaghetti was boiled and drained and set to the side while the onions and peppers did their thing. Eventually, I decided they were ready, so I preheated the oven to 400 degrees. I then went about beating the eggs with the smoked paprika (you won't miss the bacon with this!...or at least I don't which is perhaps not such a solid indicator) and then added the cheese to the mix. I combined the spaghetti with the vegetables in the skillet and then poured the egg cheese mixture on top spreading it somewhat evenly with a fork. DO NOT MIX after this point. Let it set.
I followed TPW's advice on letting the frittata sit on the stove over a medium heat for a few more minutes before moving it into the oven. The browning effect created using this method is definitely worth it and delicious. However, you'll notice I used about half the eggs she did, because I only had five but also didn't want an entire dozen. I also heeded her advice on salt. Since I had no salty ingredients, I made sure to salt and pepper liberally throughout the process. Where we most diverge is she hates eggs which are brown on top, while they are my favorite! So, I increased the oven temp to 400 from her 375 and left it in there for almost 20 minutes giving the cheese time to really melt and start to brown as well. Additionally, you might notice I swapped out potatoes (which would be totally delicious in this but don't usually reside in my house) with whole wheat thin spaghetti... which had the awesome double delight advantage of reminding me of an egg and pasta baked dish from my childhood. The Soviet version of a frittata is called a "zapikanka" which loosely translates to "baked dish" - perhaps akin to the American casserole. You can bake just about anything in the egg you have around... including leftover spaghetti, meat (if that's your pleasure), etc. So essentially, a frittata.
However, as I'm writing this (having already eaten dinner earlier), only 3/4 of my frittata remains, and I am longing to eat ALL. OF. IT. I must pace myself and save some for breakfast tomorrow and dinner and maybe lunch Wednesday if there's any left (Tuesday is a dept lunch out). There's something about the sweetness of the caramelized onion, the colors of the bell pepper, the comfort of the egg and melted cheese... Superpower #52 - willpower over tasty food smelling enticingly in one's kitchen.
Here's to hoping the rest of this week can be this productive! Cheers! And happy brunch food eating all week long!
Until next time... (hopefully in under 3 months!)
When cooking, it's often easier for me to prepare large batches rather than one or two servings at a time. Sometimes I worry that I will get sick of something I've made, and sometimes, like tonight, I make something SO good I have to blog about it just to keep from eating the entire pan! I bring you - the Monday Night Frittata. As anyone who knows me well can tell you, any kitchen creation I concoct is typically a hybrid of several recipes or inspirations. This is also a point of much chagrin for those who are foolish enough to ask me for a recipe of something I've made for them. However, in this instance, I think I can actually provide one. Feel free to tinker away with it yourselves!
But first, I would like to congratulate myself on my own Monday superpowers. While some of my friends are out training for marathons, triathlons, planning large scale events such as weddings, etc., I have accomplished what I think is perhaps an equally amazing feat today. I woke up before sunrise (around 5:15 am) and went to yoga, witnessing a spectacular magenta sunrise on U Street on the way there. I was able to hold crow for several seconds for the first time! But wait there's more!
After an incredibly productive day at work with many decisions made which felt more like a Thursday or Friday - I went grocery shopping, had dinner, did laundry, AND cooked for the week. You see where the cooking is coming into play? I had some eggs and bell peppers which needed to be consumed soon, and so the idea of a frittata had come to mind earlier in the day. I have also recently resumed my love affair with my cast iron skillet, so really, I was daydreaming about this frittata-making on this cloudy Monday ALL day.
The inspiration for my Monday frittata came in part from The Pioneer Woman's (TPW) "Sunday Frittata" which can be found here: http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2013/12/sunday-frittata/ The great thing about frittatas much like paella is that you can throw virtually whatever you have around into it.
Mine included:
2 medium onions
2 bell peppers (one yellow, one orange if you're REALLY curious)
1/4 box of whole wheat thin spaghetti
5 eggs
1/2 to 3/4 cup shredded mozzarella
Smoked paprika
Salt & pepper
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
Bit o' butter
This could not be simpler! I cut the onions in half then sliced them and got them going in the cast iron skillet on the stove top in a little bit of vegetable oil and later adding a bit o' butter. I let them cook long enough where they actually started to caramelize, and I have found this works better when they are sliced not chopped. Then I began slicing the bell peppers while the water for the pasta was also going. At some point (yes, impeccable precision here), the spaghetti was boiled and drained and set to the side while the onions and peppers did their thing. Eventually, I decided they were ready, so I preheated the oven to 400 degrees. I then went about beating the eggs with the smoked paprika (you won't miss the bacon with this!...or at least I don't which is perhaps not such a solid indicator) and then added the cheese to the mix. I combined the spaghetti with the vegetables in the skillet and then poured the egg cheese mixture on top spreading it somewhat evenly with a fork. DO NOT MIX after this point. Let it set.
I followed TPW's advice on letting the frittata sit on the stove over a medium heat for a few more minutes before moving it into the oven. The browning effect created using this method is definitely worth it and delicious. However, you'll notice I used about half the eggs she did, because I only had five but also didn't want an entire dozen. I also heeded her advice on salt. Since I had no salty ingredients, I made sure to salt and pepper liberally throughout the process. Where we most diverge is she hates eggs which are brown on top, while they are my favorite! So, I increased the oven temp to 400 from her 375 and left it in there for almost 20 minutes giving the cheese time to really melt and start to brown as well. Additionally, you might notice I swapped out potatoes (which would be totally delicious in this but don't usually reside in my house) with whole wheat thin spaghetti... which had the awesome double delight advantage of reminding me of an egg and pasta baked dish from my childhood. The Soviet version of a frittata is called a "zapikanka" which loosely translates to "baked dish" - perhaps akin to the American casserole. You can bake just about anything in the egg you have around... including leftover spaghetti, meat (if that's your pleasure), etc. So essentially, a frittata.
However, as I'm writing this (having already eaten dinner earlier), only 3/4 of my frittata remains, and I am longing to eat ALL. OF. IT. I must pace myself and save some for breakfast tomorrow and dinner and maybe lunch Wednesday if there's any left (Tuesday is a dept lunch out). There's something about the sweetness of the caramelized onion, the colors of the bell pepper, the comfort of the egg and melted cheese... Superpower #52 - willpower over tasty food smelling enticingly in one's kitchen.
Here's to hoping the rest of this week can be this productive! Cheers! And happy brunch food eating all week long!
Until next time... (hopefully in under 3 months!)
Sunday, May 25, 2014
Superhero Skill #314 - Cracking Yourself Up
Because I haven't posted in a while, and because people I love like my favorite Mom do not follow my Facebook feed... I offer you these words of wisdom here.
Highlights from my superhero civic duty of taking the Census:
1) Feeling very grateful for the big "little" things in life when being asked whether my residence has running water, a faucet, toilet, etc.
2) Feeling annoyed when "never married" is the last option in a list of "possible" relationship status choices. Isn't that the default? Don't a majority of us in fact start life "never married?"
3) Feeling conflicted when asked do I ever have difficulty dressing or bathing myself. Yes, usually Mondays.
Highlights from my superhero civic duty of taking the Census:
1) Feeling very grateful for the big "little" things in life when being asked whether my residence has running water, a faucet, toilet, etc.
2) Feeling annoyed when "never married" is the last option in a list of "possible" relationship status choices. Isn't that the default? Don't a majority of us in fact start life "never married?"
3) Feeling conflicted when asked do I ever have difficulty dressing or bathing myself. Yes, usually Mondays.
Saturday, March 22, 2014
Superhero Seeks Nemesis
Hello 3.5 dedicated readers! (I'm giving partial credit to the undoubtedly at least one "skimmer" out there.)
As superheroes (superheros? why must English be so nuanced?!) rarely have leisure time to read, it takes me FOREVER to finish a book. Speed reading might be my super power of choice if I could still soak in every word and absorb every feeling from the pages. But I digress.
Tonight I finished reading Enslaved by Ducks by Bob Tarte. An enjoyable light read which was sometimes funny, sometimes touching but did drag on a bit. Still, it got me through some stressful and challenging weeks by taking my mind off things, and for that, I am very grateful.
The book is non-fiction, and the author describes in great detail the daily undertakings that he and his wife endure in the pursuits of pet ownership of the many parrots, parakeets, ducks, geese, turkeys, rabbits, cats, and other critters. As the book's title suggests, it is not always clear who owns who (or whom? Man, English!).
And so it is with superheroes.
Life as a single thirty-something year old homeowner also comes with its inevitable burdens. I constantly find myself battling dust, gravity, shoes that refuse to stay in the closet, clutter that comes out of nowhere seemingly of its own accord against my guard. Belly dance instructors who poo-poo something as minor as scoliosis and multiple back surgeries as the possible reasons why my body simply won't cooperate with their commands. Dating websites who demand "Open This Now! It's a match!" only to show me the profile of a member who I already clicked "No" on and theoretically according to their same site took "out of the game." Moments of self-doubt when I wonder what I'm doing with my "career" and where I see myself in a year... five years... ten years.
Yet, every day, I rise. I get ready. I face the day. Lunch gets made. Bills get paid. Floors (eventually) get swept. Is this real life? It sounds much more dire than it is perhaps. I'm happy. I'm healthy. I'm making a (hopefully positive) difference in my community. But the dust bunnies and gentle pull of gravity will not be slowed. They are stealthy, patient enemies - ever advancing. Who has time for ducks??
As superheroes (superheros? why must English be so nuanced?!) rarely have leisure time to read, it takes me FOREVER to finish a book. Speed reading might be my super power of choice if I could still soak in every word and absorb every feeling from the pages. But I digress.
Tonight I finished reading Enslaved by Ducks by Bob Tarte. An enjoyable light read which was sometimes funny, sometimes touching but did drag on a bit. Still, it got me through some stressful and challenging weeks by taking my mind off things, and for that, I am very grateful.
The book is non-fiction, and the author describes in great detail the daily undertakings that he and his wife endure in the pursuits of pet ownership of the many parrots, parakeets, ducks, geese, turkeys, rabbits, cats, and other critters. As the book's title suggests, it is not always clear who owns who (or whom? Man, English!).
And so it is with superheroes.
Life as a single thirty-something year old homeowner also comes with its inevitable burdens. I constantly find myself battling dust, gravity, shoes that refuse to stay in the closet, clutter that comes out of nowhere seemingly of its own accord against my guard. Belly dance instructors who poo-poo something as minor as scoliosis and multiple back surgeries as the possible reasons why my body simply won't cooperate with their commands. Dating websites who demand "Open This Now! It's a match!" only to show me the profile of a member who I already clicked "No" on and theoretically according to their same site took "out of the game." Moments of self-doubt when I wonder what I'm doing with my "career" and where I see myself in a year... five years... ten years.
Yet, every day, I rise. I get ready. I face the day. Lunch gets made. Bills get paid. Floors (eventually) get swept. Is this real life? It sounds much more dire than it is perhaps. I'm happy. I'm healthy. I'm making a (hopefully positive) difference in my community. But the dust bunnies and gentle pull of gravity will not be slowed. They are stealthy, patient enemies - ever advancing. Who has time for ducks??
Sunday, March 16, 2014
A Jerry Sized Hole
Sometimes even superheroes get the blues. It's a beautiful yet lonely night as fluffy white snow falls mid-March and settles effortlessly along the tops of branches. Yet my heart aches for a different vision. A sight of turtles sunning themselves just as unassumingly on logs along the banks of a small man-made lake in Apex, North Carolina.
There, my dear friend Jerry and I built our friendship, and there we both got our stride back. I am so sad tonight, and my heart so heavy remembering it's been a year since he's been gone... and that I wasn't there to say goodbye with the bagpipes. I can still hear him talk and laugh. He still sometimes whispers to me in my dreams, but there are no words for the longing to take one more walk with him. To count turtles. To have him tell me about life from further down the road.
At 40 years my senior, he was always a bit ahead of me. Even when we were recovery buddies from our respective ailments. Although, I would like to believe, we were always very close in our maturity... which is to say always around 17. It worked for us. Generations apart, we had a common language. It's not something I could easily explain, although a few special people in our lives speak the same one. It knows no age. And in losing Jerry, I have come to hope it knows no bounds.
I speak to him in my heart and know he's close. It's just like him to throw a snowstorm at us when it should be spring by now. Perhaps he doesn't want us counting turtles without him... and he knows we don't want that either.
There are people throughout our lives in difficult times who offer to help. And there are those who show up. Jerry and Toby brought me into their lives and their family when I was adrift in the world, and for that, they are forever in my heart.
There, my dear friend Jerry and I built our friendship, and there we both got our stride back. I am so sad tonight, and my heart so heavy remembering it's been a year since he's been gone... and that I wasn't there to say goodbye with the bagpipes. I can still hear him talk and laugh. He still sometimes whispers to me in my dreams, but there are no words for the longing to take one more walk with him. To count turtles. To have him tell me about life from further down the road.
At 40 years my senior, he was always a bit ahead of me. Even when we were recovery buddies from our respective ailments. Although, I would like to believe, we were always very close in our maturity... which is to say always around 17. It worked for us. Generations apart, we had a common language. It's not something I could easily explain, although a few special people in our lives speak the same one. It knows no age. And in losing Jerry, I have come to hope it knows no bounds.
I speak to him in my heart and know he's close. It's just like him to throw a snowstorm at us when it should be spring by now. Perhaps he doesn't want us counting turtles without him... and he knows we don't want that either.
There are people throughout our lives in difficult times who offer to help. And there are those who show up. Jerry and Toby brought me into their lives and their family when I was adrift in the world, and for that, they are forever in my heart.
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